I’ve been having issues with my home alarm system and I got to thinking about other security.
Here’s a piece of my phone call with Lifelock yesterday morning:
(Answering my question about their methods…)
“May I call you John?”
“Sure.”
“Thank you, as I was saying, John, our identity restoration team is dedicated to helping you if your identity is compromised.”
“So you’ll look for the guy who did it?”
“We use our resources that can help find the party responsible.”
“I can help you. If someone takes my identity, just look for the guy who is suddenly annoying and there’s your man…”
“I see, John,” she laughed.
“Seriously. If there’s a normally pleasant guy who abruptly becomes irritating to talk with- I guarantee he just took on my identity.”
“Really?”
“Pfffft. Definitely. Oh, and no, I changed my mind.”
“About what?”
“About letting you call me John.”
She went quiet for a moment. “Oh, ok, I’m sorry.”
“Instead, call me Olivia De Havilland . It’ll help protect my identity.”
Confused, “Really? Olivia De Havilland?”
“Speaking. What can I do for you? …wow, I’m already used to it.”
Not impressed with my cover identity, “Mr.Higgins, are you interested in our monthly monitoring plans?”
“Who? Mr. Higgins? I don’t know any Mr. Higgins…”
(I won’t bore you with the rest of the conversation. You can see the direction it took.)